Over the top safety instructions

Morkonan · Post by **Morkonan** » Tue, 4. Sep 18, 20:19

Terre wrote:Illuminated markers embedded in the floor of the kitchen, in case of smoke, the testers could drop to the floor and still find a safe route from the building.

All stair steps leading away from the facility must have reflective marking tape on their edges... We had glow-in-the-dark reflective non-skid epoxy paint. Every square foot had emergency lighting, too, and woe-unto-us if a fire-inspector (Always wonder why those guys were called that, since they didn't actually inspect any fires while they were there.) found a bad battery in one of them.

There must be exposion-proof motors in everything and fume hoods over anything that isn't immediately identifiable as a rock, a unleaded pencil, or a piece of paper.

So, we need correct signage and safety-route indicators, emergency lighting, fume hoods, explosion-proof motors, and...

@Usenko - Have disposal considerations been examined and have proper environmental remediation regulations been discussed?

esd · Post by **esd** » Wed, 5. Sep 18, 15:00

Hazard: Theivery of brownies.
Action: Trained, armed, security must be on standby at all times. Separate risk assessment for the presence of firearms attached.

matthewfarmery · Post by **matthewfarmery** » Wed, 5. Sep 18, 15:22

I have one,

test if the all chair backs are upright and not at an angle over 5 degrees, to avoid anyone from falling back on the chair. You could also test if the backs are firm or not.

another could be, all chairs must have 4 legs, anything less is a safety hazard.

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Wed, 5. Sep 18, 16:23

Antiparasite injections in case of exposure (tapeworm, etc).
Lapel dosimiter for cumulative radiation exposure.
Morkonan's fume hoods and Felter's vomit buckets for toxic inhalation and ingestion incidents.

Just how bad a cook IS she? Better play it safe and use my rules for cooking. Ho, punchline!

The therapy puppy idea was hilarious btw.

Ezarkal · Post by **Ezarkal** » Thu, 6. Sep 18, 04:56

Morkonan wrote:
..and in the mechanical stirrer in the lab...
How about that one unbalanced magnetic stirrer you got on sale?

<tinkety tink tank tink tankitty tink tank tink> @$%@$ Stop with the darn "tinkitty tank tink" already! <tinkety tink tank tink tinkitty> ARRGH!

Hey, that stirrer is important. It allows me to mix my powdered fruit punch for lunch.

Besides, if you ever worked in a lab, you will know there's always something somewhere making more noise than it should... Stirrer, high-vac pump, mass spectrometer, rotavap, colleague singing... Always something.

EDIT: On that note, the use of security ear plugs to dampen strong (or debilitating noises) should be strongly recommended.

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Thu, 13. Sep 18, 01:01

Re: the clinking stirrer known to induce psychotic episodes: how about other people's music?

Bob g**damned Marley every freaking day. Or Beethoven every freaking day.

It doesn't matter how good the music is. The "every freaking day" part makes you want to break a guitar and/or cello over someone's head.

You can tell who's damn day it is by which same damn music is filling the whole accursed laboratory.

Everyone vetoes that one guy from India who always wants country music. One small step for science I guess.

Morkonan · Post by **Morkonan** » Thu, 13. Sep 18, 18:03

Aye Capn wrote:...It doesn't matter how good the music is. The "every freaking day" part makes you want to break a guitar and/or cello over someone's head....

"POLKA WILL NEVER DIE!" - Waldo Butters

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Thu, 13. Sep 18, 20:39

And never forget Weird Al ...

felter · Post by **felter** » Thu, 13. Sep 18, 21:13

Morkonan wrote:
Aye Capn wrote:...It doesn't matter how good the music is. The "every freaking day" part makes you want to break a guitar and/or cello over someone's head....
"POLKA WILL NEVER DIE!" - Waldo Butters

Darn ears started to bleed.

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Fri, 14. Sep 18, 20:44

If neither guitar nor cello served a blow to the head from an accordion might make you forget the pain ...

brucewarren · Post by **brucewarren** » Fri, 14. Sep 18, 21:38

@felter

Assuming you were serious might I suggest that you never ever, under any circumstance allow yourself within a half a mile of a group of people who think they know how to play the bagpipes.

Hank001 · Post by **Hank001** » Fri, 14. Sep 18, 22:47

Okay when it comes to WAY over the top safety films I think I've got you all the ultimate set of them. I mean you can't be TOO safe dropping nukes can you?

Safety Tips When Delievering A Nuclear Attack:

https://youtu.be/UBbTC37EGy8

Nuclear Might: Ready But Safe

https://youtu.be/eQweS4A83G0

Morkonan · Post by **Morkonan** » Sat, 15. Sep 18, 19:35

Hank001 wrote:Okay when it comes to WAY over the top safety films I think I've got you all the ultimate set of them. I mean you can't be TOO safe dropping nukes can you? ...

Notice that these were made right after "Failsafe" came out.

(One of my favorite "Cold War" movies.)

Nuclear Safety Message: If you can see the light from the blast, no safety precautions are *necessary.

*You won't need them. Ever.

Hank001 · Post by **Hank001** » Sat, 15. Sep 18, 21:25

Good one! 7 Days in May was another but here is how Hank001 stopped worrying and learned to love the bomb. Doctor Stranglelove on what not to do with a nuke:

https://youtu.be/snTaSJk0n_Y

Yehaw!!!!!!!!......

Retiredman · Post by **Retiredman** » Sun, 16. Sep 18, 00:09

Air filtration system on the stove.
You must not have brownie fumes drifting into the air.
Some person with a crazed fetish for brownies might attack.
or an attack by brownie zombies.

Stove must not be a gas cooker.
Gas buildup might cause an explosion and mix the brownies with the
cook. Brownies would then taste terrible.

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Mon, 17. Sep 18, 23:24

Sugar and spice didn't just spring whole into the Royal Academy of Comestibles by spontaneous generation.

Trigger warning for cultural appropriation!

Ezarkal · Post by **Ezarkal** » Tue, 18. Sep 18, 15:29

Don't forget to include the material safety data sheet for the different ingredients you'll be using.

Here's the one for sugar: http://www.sciencelab.com/msds.php?msdsId=9927285

I really like the first aid measures:

Section 4: First Aid Measures
Eye Contact:
Check for and remove any contact lenses. In case of contact, immediately flush eyes with plenty of water for at least 15
minutes. Cold water may be used. Get medical attention if irritation occurs.

Skin Contact:
Wash with soap and water. Cover the irritated skin with an emollient. Get medical attention if irritation develops. Cold water
may be used.
Serious Skin Contact: Not available.
Inhalation:
If inhaled, remove to fresh air. If not breathing, give artificial respiration. If breathing is difficult, give oxygen. Get medical
attention.
Serious Inhalation: Not available.
Ingestion:
Do NOT induce vomiting unless directed to do so by medical personnel. Never give anything by mouth to an unconscious
person. Loosen tight clothing such as a collar, tie, belt or waistband. Get medical attention if symptoms appear.
Serious Ingestion: Not available.

Hank001 · Post by **Hank001** » Tue, 18. Sep 18, 15:34

@ Ezarkal

Now I'm giving sweeting my coffee a rethink. NOT.

Post by **Alan Phipps** » Tue, 18. Sep 18, 15:48

Re the above incomplete sucrose first aid measure:

Serious Ingestion: take regular strenuous activities such as sports or exercise.

(See appropriate risk analysis for strenuous activities.)

Aye Capn · Post by **Aye Capn** » Tue, 18. Sep 18, 21:41

OMG Ezarkal you are EPIC my man. Laughing so hard right now ...

egosoft.com

egosoft.com

Over the top safety instructions