Let's Talk About Coffee Machines ....

[Hank001]

Morkonan ponders:

WTF is "decaffeinated coffee?" That's - That's illegal, isn't it? (Sorry I missed your post earlier.)

Decaf: Coffee with essential ingredients removed or to quote David Letterman: "warm dirty water".

[jlehtone]

Decaf: Coffee with essential ingredients removed or to quote David Letterman: "warm dirty water".

Tea?

Drinking coffee from an "automatic drip" coffee-maker, right now.

Where gravity pulls water through coffee (at most) once. No pressure.

[brucewarren]

Tea?

Now you've done it. While I don't drink the black stuff myself I get the impression that to some people it's rather important.

A certain Empire was pretty much built on it, a certain group of rebels caused a war when they threw it into the sea and most importantly of all:-

All British tanks have carried a device for making tea for over half a century so that soldiers don't have to risk their lives getting out of the vehicle when a brew up is required.

[Hank001]

brucewarren notes:

All British tanks have carried a device for making tea for over half a century so that soldiers don't have to risk their lives getting out of the vehicle when a brew up is required.

And US Air Force cargo planes fly with built in coffee makers. Guess they can't go hopping out to build a fire either.

[Aye Capn]

Decaf is illegal above the drinking age of 16. Giving someone decaf is assault and battery.

[Hank001]

Aye Capn:

Decaf is illegal above the drinking age of 16. Giving someone decaf is assault and battery.

Assault with intent to swill?

[Hank001]

Waking up this forum with an update on those coffeemakers I said the US Air Force have in their bigger aircraft. They made the news:

$1300 Coffee Pots Heat Up

(3D printers to the rescue!)

[Aye Capn]

Speaking of military-grade coffee anyone have any "war stories" about their military-ration coffee?

A lot of military guys swear by sucking the coffee grounds chewing-tobacco-style. Is that really a thing?

[Hank001]

@ Aye Capn
Back up search the old posts by me. We've been over my wartime experiences with MRE coffee.

[Morkonan]

Waking up this forum with an update on those coffeemakers I said the US Air Force have in their bigger aircraft. They made the news:

$1300 Coffee Pots Heat Up

(3D printers to the rescue!)

BWAHAHAHA!

And, they re-order the same damn cup? What? Nobody respecc'd out that darn cup, yet?

There's gotta be something hot in there. They've got heaters. Heck, I bet that radio gets hot! Cook off some flares? Something, somewhere, gets hot and someone will use it. There isn't a soldier issued that hasn't found a way to make a cup of hot coffee... Ain't no such animal. Some Airman, somewhere, is heating up his coffee right now using non-approved means to do so and his crew chief doesn't give a crap because he's waiting on it, too. So, figure out what they are doing and just do that and be done with it.

What are those handles made of, Bakelite?

[Hank001]

@ Morkonan
Nah. Those pots click onto a bulkhead mounted hotplate so the pot is secure during turbulance. I worked on a crash team and was at the site of a C-141 crash in Tennessee. No survivors, but the coffee pot was still clasped securely to the hotplate. (True Story) The whole rig; Pot, Hotplate, etc cost $1300 USD. I'd imagine the pot prices out to around $500 to 600 USD. I'll tell you the God's Truth. The handles? Yes they get broken. FREQUENTLY. Why? They are not dropped. Oh no. Crew and PAX forget/don't know to unlatch the pot BEFORE they grap the handle and try to yank out the pot. So they grab the handle, yank and... Oops!

Seen it happen... More than once.

[BigBANGtheory]

brucewarren notes:

All British tanks have carried a device for making tea for over half a century so that soldiers don't have to risk their lives getting out of the vehicle when a brew up is required.

And US Air Force cargo planes fly with built in coffee makers. Guess they can't go hopping out to build a fire either.

I really don't want to know how the steam for a Latte is prepared on a nuclear submarine

[Hank001]

@ BigBANGtheory:

Hey you know? Glow in the dark latte foam? Might catch on.

[Morkonan]

@ Morkonan
Nah. Those pots click onto a bulkhead mounted hotplate so the pot is secure during turbulance. I worked on a crash team and was at the site of a C-141 crash in Tennessee. No survivors, but the coffee pot was still clasped securely to the hotplate. (True Story)

One survivor, then...

(My apologies, it had to be said. And, my condolences to those involved. There is no humor involved, there, just the pain of gathering up the pieces.)

The whole rig; Pot, Hotplate, etc cost $1300 USD. I'd imagine the pot prices out to around $500 to 600 USD. I'll tell you the God's Truth. The handles? Yes they get broken. FREQUENTLY. Why? They are not dropped. Oh no. Crew and PAX forget/don't know to unlatch the pot BEFORE they grap the handle and try to yank out the pot. So they grab the handle, yank and... Oops!

Seen it happen... More than once.

You're friggin' right! I have no doubt of it at all - That's what is happening and they're blaming a knock/drop for it.

I saw the little cubby behind it and figure that's what it was for, but didn't think about extra restraints. I thought the back plate somehow latched into the plug in the back on the bulkhead. I can easily see someone just grabbing that handle and yanking... You should write an anonymous letter, debriefing them on wtf is "really" happening.

BUT, IMO, there's some officer in charge, here, that wants to make his mark by pushing in new 3D Printing tech to solve the problem and then expand its use to anything he can think of as a means to "save money." Knob broke? PRINT IT! Snappy ring spacer thingie broke? PRINT IT! "It worked for the coffee pots and I can make it work for all sorts of other things, too!" "

"Thank you, Colonel. Meritoriously move to the top of the promotion list and collect your medals... and your new staff car."

It's not a bad idea, as long as there aren't material issues that present design problems. Don't want that new switch melting, do we? In fact, I'm in favor of "just in time manufacturing." It saves a lot of cash when it's logistically possible. And, if you can do it "on location, on demand?" That's a huge bonus, too. The advances in 3D printing if it had a truly beneficial military application would simply skyrocket and bring it closer to being what it really could be - A new market possibility. (I've long been in favor of having 3D printers in all the major "Do it yourself" stores. It's just the supply and support problems that's an issue. This could make solutions much more possible.)

But, if those printed handles melt or the screws/rivets pull out too easily or they fall apart in certain common environmental conditions, it's "not a solution" and a waste of money. Better to take that money and invest in better coffee... Friggin' "Chok-Full-O-Nuts" or whatever the lowest bidder supplies just ain't right.

[Hank001]

Morkonan says:

But, if those printed handles melt or the screws/rivets pull out too easily or they fall apart in certain common environmental conditions, it's "not a solution" and a waste of money. Better to take that money and invest in better coffee... Friggin' "Chok-Full-O-Nuts" or whatever the lowest bidder supplies just ain't right.

Back 8n the day it was generic in a white go'ment can that said Coffee, Ground and the Federal Stock Number. If you looked at the fine print it either said Nabisco or Folgers. But somebody always brought real coffee. Helped if you wanted your seat upgraded.

[Aye Capn]

Coffee must be Food of the Gods to you military guys. Love your stories!

[Hank001]

Aye Capn nails it noting:

Coffee must be Food of the Gods to you military guys. Love your stories!

Ambrosia. Nobody sane that I knew of resorted to caffine tablets. They only gave you jitters and plugged you up badly. So if you were not in a position to brew a cuppa, you munched instant coffee. Yet no substitute for a boiling hot cup of Joe. I admit that in the 24 years since I retired I've never had to resort to coffee sans H2O. In place I've lugged around high grade thermos bottles, something you couldn't do in in a fighter cocpkpit or a serious boony crawl where the smell of hot coffee would give your position away.

I don't know about the other services but the US Air Force runs on for the most parts on 3 fuels. Coffee and JP4 and JP8 jet fuels...

[Morkonan]

... They only gave you jitters and plugged you up badly....

The Shakes... Caffeine tabs and other stims, like ephedrine derivatives, dump everything at once. And, when they're gone, you need another or you're going to crash. I got so hyped up on "White Crosses" (ephedrine) one time that my eyeballs shook. (Not abusing them, really, just had to stay up.)

Coffee is smooth, gradual, a cup here and there will do ya. Got the jitters? Eat a cracker or two.

Caffeine is the most "abused" drug there is. It's extremely addictive, but luckily is generally only harmful in large amounts. I'm an addict and my body is fully acclimated to having as little blood in my caffeine system as possible.

Today, I ran out of coffee, so now it's time to go to the grocery store! The idea of being without at least my morning cups is... terrifying. (Was only able to have one and a half cups of coffee this morning, which is about three to four cups worth to normal people.)

[Hank001]

@ Morkonan:
Happy Halloween! Here's a scary image for you:



Booo!

[Morkonan]

@ Morkonan:
Happy Halloween! Here's a scary image for you:
...
Booo!

/twitch

@$%@$ that!

We had the old metal corrugated five-pounds-of-soon-to-be-rectal-devastation cans... Industrial Strength, you could not have used it to clean aircraft aluminum, that's for damn sure. Would definitely eat the heck out of cosmoline, though.

There's a nerve on the right-hand side of my face that still twitches every time I think of that swill...

PS: Elgin Prepares for Halloween (2010) A pumpkin, uniform now complete, who's safety is assured...