Analysis...

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Jericho
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Analysis...

Post by Jericho » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 10:30

I have to type the word:

Code: Select all

Analysis
many times a day in my job. Often while sharing my screen... Often while projecting onto a big screen to dozens of people.

This happens every time:

Code: Select all

Anal
Pause... The thought pops into my head:
"Did I just type Anal in huge letters in front of 30 people?"

I hit one more letter on the keyboard:

Code: Select all

Analy
Pause... The thought pops into my head:
"Did I just type Analy in huge letters in front of 30 people?"

Then I pause again, and realize that the keys on my laptop are slightly smaller than the ones on my keyboard at my desk, and I suddenly forget how to type, so ANALY is on the screen in big letters.

Then I think: "Must not type Vaginal.... Must not type Vaginal."

Some how I make it through.


Thank god I never have to type Cumbersome.
"I've got a bad feeling about this!" Harrison Ford, 5 times a year, trying to land his plane.

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mrbadger
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Post by mrbadger » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 11:05

I don't dare type live in front of my students. That would just instantly fail.

But I use the whiteboard a lot in my lectures (blackboards are too old fashioned apparently).

I live in fear that what I draw will somehow resemble something rude, particularly if I'm using Venn diagrams or some grouping method for clustering, or the FIFO (First In First Out) pipe transferring data from one machine to another in a cluster.

So many possibilities to humiliate myself....
If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared. ... Niccolò Machiavelli

Jericho
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Post by Jericho » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 11:42

mrbadger wrote:I don't dare type live in front of my students. That would just instantly fail.

But I use the whiteboard a lot in my lectures (blackboards are too old fashioned apparently).

I live in fear that what I draw will somehow resemble something rude, particularly if I'm using Venn diagrams or some grouping method for clustering, or the FIFO (First In First Out) pipe transferring data from one machine to another in a cluster.

So many possibilities to humiliate myself....
I was recently doing a patent submission at work, and talking to a friend who is a "Master Inventor" (true title due to the number of patents he has), and he was tired one day after being awoken at 3 by his spawn, and didn't really fully appreciate the diagrams on a patent that his name was on. The two giant flesh coloured circles just touching, with pink central smaller circles... It was an honest mistake, but also a good child's drawing of boobs.

The patent lawyers weren't happy.
"I've got a bad feeling about this!" Harrison Ford, 5 times a year, trying to land his plane.

CBJ
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Post by CBJ » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 13:21

My biggest typing-related issue, as a programmer, is the word "buffer". Somehow my fingers are always 1cm too far to the right trying to type the "f"s. Heaven help me if a video is buffering.

Bishop149
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Post by Bishop149 » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 13:21

I once went to a seminar given by a Chinese gentleman whose English wasn't the best, but generally still perfectly adequate for purpose.
I forget the exact specifics but the topic under discussion was very statistical / computational, thus he used the word "Analysis" A LOT.

Problem was he pronounced it: "Anal-lysis". . . . which is funny to any audience but to a group of biologists it takes on a whole other meaning.

I hope some might have taken him aside afterwards. . . . . I didn't I'm afraid.
"Shoot for the Moon. If you miss, you'll end up co-orbiting the Sun alongside Earth, living out your days alone in the void within sight of the lush, welcoming home you left behind." - XKCD

Xenon_Slayer
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Post by Xenon_Slayer » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 13:34

I sometimes only type partial words into the search bar before pressing enter. Can lead to some immature chuckles when I'm working on cockpit code.

Jericho
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Post by Jericho » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 14:54

When my dad retired from the firebrigade, he set up a safety company, supplying safety/hazardous materials personnel for emergencies.

He was getting requests for people familiar with some heavy machinery stuff, and wanted me to help him search for it on the internet (With was probably 1995-1996, so INTERNET was still new, and certainly new to our house.)

The name/acronym for the machinery was:
S
C
A
T

and he wanted me to search for it with him... On the internet...

I showed him what to do with Yahoo search and told him it was my turn to drive that night and bolted for the pub.
"I've got a bad feeling about this!" Harrison Ford, 5 times a year, trying to land his plane.

Alan Phipps
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Post by Alan Phipps » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 14:56

I have similar chuckles or gosh-moments from the auto-correct functions on various text apps that change text to what *it* thinks you meant to type. (I assume this could also apply with live presentation apps.) Some examples:

Input 'I must admit' - Displayed text 'I mustard mitt'.

Input 'You should not do this' - Displayed text 'You should now do this'

Input 'He travelled a long time' - Displayed text 'He travelled along time'
A dog has a master; a cat has domestic staff.

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red assassin
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Post by red assassin » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 17:50

I once typoed the word "counts" in a very serious paper. Fortunately, I caught it on the last pre-submission proofread, but that could have been bad.
A still more glorious dawn awaits, not a sunrise, but a galaxy rise, a morning filled with 400 billion suns - the rising of the Milky Way

Bishop149
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Post by Bishop149 » Fri, 13. Oct 17, 17:57

red assassin wrote:I once typoed the word "counts" in a very serious paper. Fortunately, I caught it on the last pre-submission proofread, but that could have been bad.
As a reviewer I would have enjoyed correcting that . . . . . I'd have awarded bonus points if the mistaken word made any kind of sense at all within the context it found itself.
"Shoot for the Moon. If you miss, you'll end up co-orbiting the Sun alongside Earth, living out your days alone in the void within sight of the lush, welcoming home you left behind." - XKCD

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Morkonan
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Post by Morkonan » Sat, 14. Oct 17, 00:46

Muscle memory is an interesting thing when applied to typing stuffs... It's funny how certain letter combinations wake up certain parts of the brain, causing muscle memory to either falter or to go into overdrive mode, slaved to the current meme bouncing around in one's head...

My most feared word is "exercise." Dunno why, but I always want to add a "c" to it. These days, I run into the "cavalry" vs "Calvary" issue a lot.

I also have lots of extra commas, if anyone needs a few... and trailing dots/periods, of course.

(Dramatic pauses are supposed to be hyphens, but I can't seem to force muscle-memory to remember that. Oh, and I routinely add/forget hyphens, too.)

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